Liebe Leser,
ups.
Meine letzte Nachricht ist tatsächlich bereits ein volles
Jahr her. Nichtsdestotrotz ist der Lebenswert-Rundbrief zum
Jahreswechsel bereits seit 1999 derart feste Tradition, dass
er auch 2010 nicht fehlt.
Apropos Weihnachten – Szenen einer Ehe:
Ort: Wohnzimmer.
Kinder spielen.
Frau sitzt auf Sessel und starrt ins Leere.
Mann verdaut, liegend auf der Couch.
Sie: “Im nächsten Leben werde ich Tinkerbell.”
Er: “Die Fee?”
Sie: “Ja. Was dagegen?!”
Stille.
Noch etwas Organisatorisches:
Emails habe ich schon seit einem Jahr nicht mehr abgerufen.
Tut mir leid.
Ich gehe hiermit also in die Email-Insolvenz. Will sagen:
Ich lösche all die hunderten und tausenden Emails ungelesen
und fange neu an.
Wer mir schreibt, den lese ich auch wieder!
Und falls die Frage aufkommen sollte: Der Grund, warum es
2010 keinen Rundbrief gab ist der, dass ich nichts weiss.
Früher war das einfacher – da war ich derart klug, dass ich
bekanntlich immer Recht hatte und vieles an Weisheit von mir
geben musste, auf dass die Welt daran genese.
Aber mit dem Alter kam auch die Einsicht, dass ich
prinzipiell keine Ahnung habe.
Schreiben kann man viel.
Vielleicht lebe ich jetzt auch diese Dinge einfach mehr und
muss weniger darüber reden.
Naja, wir werden sehen, was 2011 in dieser Sache bringt.
Vielleicht ist die Welt jetzt bereit für mich, höhöhö.
Was uns direkt zum Thema führt:
Wie die Dinge sind.
Es trug sich einst zu, dass ich vor vielen vielen (und es
sind mehr als ich dachte) Jahren einmal die Klasse 12 am
örtlichen Gymnasium besuchte auf dem Weg zum Abitur.
Ab Klasse 12 wählte man sich schickfein “Kurse”. Dabei waren
zwei Hauptfächer zu besetzen, die Leistungskurse.
Da mein Gymnasium nicht unbedingt in “The City” lag, war
jedoch nicht jede Kombination machbar. Ich wollte eigentlich
Mathe und Englisch nehmen.
Aber weil das sehr viele wollten (Zahlen kannten die meisten
fast alle auswendig und Englisch hatte man schonmal gehört),
waren die Kurse hoffnungslos überfüllt.
Ich bin kein Freund von Massenveranstaltungen.
So kam es, dass der Leistungskurs Physik noch händeringend
nach einem Teilnehmer suchte. Denn wo in einem Kurs zu viel
Leute sitzen, waren im anderen zu wenig. Und wenn zu wenig
teilnehmen, dann kommt der Kurs nicht zustande.
So ziemlich am letztmöglichen Tag (wenn meine Erinnerung
mich nicht trügen sollte) wechselte ich also per Handschlag
von Englisch nach Physik.
Da waren wir also, eine handvoll männlicher Helden im
kleinen Kreis. Und ich sollte lernen über Physik.
Aber man höre und staune – ich lernte sogar fürs Leben.
Und davon handelt die heutige Email.
Es fing ganz harmlos an, wie jeder Physikunterricht.
Es gibt ja bekanntlich “physikalische Gesetze”.
Das sind Dinge, die einfach so sind.
Grund: Weil die so sind.
Dafür gibt es mehr oder weniger komplexe Formeln, um diese
Umstände möglichst genau zu berechnen.
Wir rechneten also, experimentierten ein wenig, rechneten
mehr, lernten Formeln und warum Dinge so sind wie sie sind,
weil sie eben so sind.
(Ja, es dreht sich im Kreis, richtig erkannt.)
Doch schon nach wenigen Monaten stiegen wir tiefer und
tiefer in das Feld der Physik hinab und verliessen die Wege,
die die anderen Schüler (und fast alle “normalen” Menschen)
bis ans Ende ihrer seligen Tage für die einzigen Wege
halten.
Nun lernten wir nicht nur Formeln und Gesetze – sondern der
Lehrplan sah auch vor, dass wir die Entstehungsgeschichte
dieser Dinge hinterblicken sollten.
Dank der wenigen Teilnehmer bei dieser Veranstaltung kamen
wir schnell voran.
Und ich sah: Physik läuft in etwa so:
Irgendwer stellt irgendwann irgendetwas fest.
Die berühmteste Geschichte ist wohl der Physiker Newton, dem
beim täglichen Pennen unterm Baum ein Apfel auf den Kopf
fiel.
Statt einem üblen Kobold die Schuld zu geben (was völlig
legitim wäre, siehe unten), entschloss er sich, dass es ja
ein Gesetz sein müsse, das den Apfel gen Erde und auf seinen
Schädel brachte.
So wurde die Schwerkraft geboren.
Newton warf also geschätzte tausend Äpfel, stoppte Fallhöhen
und Zeiten, maß Aufprallenergien und packte alles in eine
Formel.
Und fertig war das Gesetz der Schwerkraft mit einer Formel,
die bis heute verwendet wird, weil Äpfel auch noch heute so
fallen wie vor hunderten von Jahren.
Aber das “Gesetz” war gar keines. Es ist nie eines.
Denn zu späteren Zeiten wollten andere es genauer wissen.
Und je genauer sie hinsahen, desto klarer wurde:
Newtons “Formel” funktionierte nur grob.
Wenn es plötzlich um Milliardstel von Sekunden geht, müssen
noch andere Aspekte mit einberechnet werden.
So brachten spätere Physiker also “genauere Formeln” auf.
Diese funktionierten so lange… bis sie nicht mehr
funktionierten.
Und wenn etwas nicht nach Formel funktioniert, dann tut man
als Physiker was? Man bastelt eine neue Formel, die mit den
Testergebnissen übereinstimmt. Tut sie das, ist eine neue
Formel geboren und wir haben ein neues “Gesetz”.
Alternativ kann man auch unsichtbare, unmessbare Fabelwesen
erfinden, die die unerwarteten Ergebnisse durch die
(natürlich absolut heilige und korrekte) Formel erklären.
Und nein: Ich scherze nicht.
Physiker beobachten nur was passiert und pressen das ganze
dann in eine Formel.
Und irgendwann passiert einmal etwas, das es eigentlich
nicht geben dürfte – dann wird die Formel eben geändert oder
ein unsichtbares Fabelwesen erfunden, das damit auch noch
gleich bewiesen ist.
Auf diese Geschichte stiess ich wieder, als ich mit meinen
Kindern eine “Was ist Was”-CD anhörte, wo Wissenschaft
kindgerecht(?) erklärt wird. Thema: Astronomie.
Der Erzähler erklärte hier die so genannten “schwarzen
Löcher”.
Fazit: Die Astronomen beobachten also den Himmel und packen
alles in Formeln. Und irgendwann beobachten sie wieder etwas
– aber das passt nicht zu den Formeln.
Was tun?
Wie wir wissen:
Entweder Formel ändern oder Fabelwesen erfinden.
Da die Formel zu ändern wohl zu kompliziert war, änderte man
einfach das Universum. Da, wo man nichts sah, musste aber
doch was sein. Also einigte man sich darauf, dass das, was
da sein musste, Eigenschaften haben musste, die es
eigentlich so nicht gab und die für Menschen auch nicht
vorstellbar (wohl aber berechenbar) sind.
Diese Dinger wurden “schwarze Löcher” getauft und heute
erklärt der Sprecher auf der Kinder-CD lustig alle “Fakten”
über schwarze Löcher.
Das Beste dabei:
Der “Beweis” (ja, so wird es auf der CD tatsächlich
genannt!) für schwarze Löcher ist … trommelwirbel… die
Tatsache, dass die bekannten Formeln eines Tages nicht mehr
funktioniert haben, aber weil sie ja richtig sind (???) MUSS
es also zwangsläufig schwarze Löcher geben.
Ich wiederhole: Das ist KEIN Witz.
Die Herren und Damen Wissenschaftler könnten auch sagen,
dass an dieser und jener Stelle im Weltraum ein unsichtbarer
Riese sitzen muss, der die Sterne in eine solche und solche
Richtung anpustet.
Das wäre wissenschaftlich genauso erwiesen wie die Theorie
der schwarzen Löcher.
Aber unter uns: “Unsichtbarer Riese” hört sich einfach nicht
so wissenschaftlich an.
Und wenn man die Verdienstmöglichkeiten als Physiker mit
denen eines professionellen Märchenerzählers vergleicht – ja
dann entscheidet man sich eben für den Physiker als
Berufsziel, will ich meinen.
Später kam mir der Verdacht, dass nicht nur Physiker so
arbeiten – sondern alle Wissenschaftler.
Seit jeher.
Und weil wir ja alle brav sind und glauben, was uns erzählt
wird, haben wir diese Denkweise gleich mit übernommen im
Laufe der letzten 1000(?) Jahre.
Mir scheint, von der Welt an sich haben wir allesamt keinen
Schimmer.
Wie ist sie “wirklich” und was ist die “Wirklichkeit”?
Bekanntlich beschreibt ein Blinder den Elefanten ganz anders
als ein Tauber – und doch ist es der gleiche Elefant.
Wie sehr sie es auch versucht – nie wird die Wissenschaft
die Wahrheit herausfinden.
Und unser Verstand wird nie die Wirklichkeit sehen.
Dennoch: Forschung und Denken hat seine Berechtigung. Nur
sollte man stets im Auge behalten, was man hier tut und sich
entsprechend (un)ernst nehmen.
Wenn Fabelwesen helfen, die Welt zu erklären – immer gerne!
Wer mir jetzt aber erzählen möchte, das Christkind gebe es
gar nicht, dafür aber sehr wohl schwarze Löcher – mmmh, wer
nur an eines glaubt, ist unlogisch.
Wer an keines von beiden glaubt ist vielleicht haltlos, ich
weiss es nicht. Oder gottlos.
Das könnte auch das gleiche sein, wer weiss.
Wer an beide glaubt und doch weiss, dass es sie gibt und
doch nicht gibt – dem steht ein magisches Jahr 2011 bevor.
In meiner Welt kann man sich übrigens aussuchen, was man
glauben möchte.
Apropos: Zum Jahreswechsel 2010-2011 habe ich ein
gigantomanisches Feuerwerk gekauft und lasse es richtig
krachen.
Das vertreibt die bösen Geister, erschreckt Tiere, kostet
ein Vermögen und macht eine Riesengaudi.
Ich interpretiere das so, dass ich mit einem grossen
Auftritt ein grosses Jahr 2011 einleite.
Andere finden, dass ich mit dem grossen Knall ganz klar
beweise, dass ich einen grossen Knall habe.
Also dann – komm gut rüber, wir sehen uns dann dort.
thomas
Cool, die neue Seite! Und so aufgeräumt …
jepp.
ich war erste, die erfreut reagierte.
und wurde umgehend gelöscht.
na danke auch …..
“Gott” Tom löscht uns, wie es ihm gefällt. Wir sind nur namenlose Buchstaben in seinem virtuellen Reich.
Falls Du mal etwas in einem Forum lesen oder schreiben möchtest, empfehle ich denkforum.at.
Liebe Grüße!
Man kann auch einen großen Knall haben, ohne groß rumzuknallen.
In diesem Sinne.
Vobro
Man kann auch groß rumknallen, ohne groß Ahnung zu haben.
Amen.
Vobro ist ein Arschloch
Huch, ich hab ein paar Minuten gebraucht, bis ich feststellte, dass ich mich nicht in der Seite geirrt habe *lach*
Schick und ordentlich ists hier nun
Kleine Frage am Rande: Wird es wieder ein Forum geben? (Oder gibts vielleicht sogar eins und ich bin zu schusselig um es zu finden?)
Liebe Grüße in die Runde!
Sadie (<– hat auch nen Knall *zwinker*)
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Huch! Das ist ja ne ziemliche Spam-Meile, hier.
Kleine Geschäftemacher unter sich …. Kobolde?
Also, ich hab mich beim Lesen königlich amüsiert. Schade, dass solche Dinge nicht öfters auch in Zeitungen veröffentlicht werden. Im Sinne der Verbreitung von erheiternden Texten mit Tiefgang werde ich das kopieren und mit Quellenangabe auf meiner fb-Seite veröffentlichen.
Weiterhin viel Spass, viele Knallfrösche und auch sonstige Kurzschlüsse
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